I have had a very low week. I feel like the honeymoon phase of my sobriety has worn off and my meds have either not kicked in or need to be increased. I have an appointment with my psychiatrist on Tuesday. I would like to increase my dosage of Sertraline. I’ve been at 50mg a day for six weeks now. I know it takes quite a bit of time for it to really kick in. Sometimes longer than eight weeks. But I’m not feeling good. I felt positive when I ditched the booze but that has waned. I spent all day in bed sleeping a couple days ago. At least I’m not waking up with a hangover.
I’m back from my trip and the anxieties of my work have come back full strength. I was stressed before I left. Now there is an additional two weeks piled on my desk and my accountants want to have a tax meeting this next Thursday. I’m not ready. I’m going to try to reschedule for the following week with them. I’ve been ignoring phone calls and now have a pretty good list of people I need to call back. One thing at a time. I know I can get through it. I just have to keep reminding myself that. Don’t look at the big pile, get it done piece by piece.
Deep breaths…. This will pass… I know that there will be ups and downs. It’s just hard to see anything in the downs. Even if I can’t see, I can still count. Today marks 46 days of no booze.